Has it been that long since we’ve talked about our crazy cousin to the south, Florida? Well, fear not. (insert news alert noise) Breaking news from Charlotte County FLA: Amanda Willis was the maid of honor for Brian and Jennifer Butler and everything was going well at the wedding, but then at the reception she got schwasted in like 20 minutes. Guest report that she downed a bottle of Fireball as soon as she got there, then she started asking people for their car keys. She grabbed the best man’s keys and jumped in his car and tried to take off. The groomsman jumped on the hood, and held on for dear life and then after he wrestled her out of the car, she ran back inside to the reception and proceeded to down a bottle of Captain Morgan’s. Then she turned violent. Deputies who showed to up to the scene report: “Willis claimed to be having an asthma attack and started shaking as if she were having a seizure. They took her to Bayfront Punta Gorda, where she exposed herself to deputies, assaulted two medics and kicked over her bed pan, according to the sheriff’s office.” BTW, this is Willis’ ninth in Charlotte County. She faces charges of larceny, battery, grand theft of a motor vehicle, and violation of probation.
Be Just and Fear Not